This client is a middle-aged woman with a lovely smile and motherly disposition. She came to me because she always had money issues. She had recently filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy. She has an ambivalence to money, and felt that at one time she was rich and had abused her power and that somehow she didn’t deserve a second chance. She has been doing a life of service and had mixed feelings about money and success. She felt that in a previous life that she had been a total bitch (her words) and that people hated her for her money and power. She associated being hated with affluence. There was a pattern of 1. I don’t want to be visible because visible people get hurt, 2. I don’t want to be successful because successful people get punished, and 3. I should not have money because I am no good with it and don’t deserve it.
There was also the residual shame of having to file for chapter 11 and the accumulated anger of all the people who were pissed off at her because of her inability to pay them back. She felt deep sorrow because of the pain to others she had caused.
I did a few diagnostic journeys, coming back from time to time to record what I found and to ask a few questions. After the first diagnostic journey, I asked my client: Were you now or had you ever been married? Her response was “no”. Then I asked: Have you ever been in love with a man? (I assumed that she was straight.) Her answer again was no, and on her face was the look of shock that I asked this question and shame that it hadn’t happened to her – at 50 or so years old, the odds were dimming that this would ever happen. I thanked her and went back to work. Good, I was on the right track.
It soon became obvious that my client’s problem didn’t originate in her lifetime. It started way before, and I was transported to the 1500s (?) where my client was a beautiful young servant in a duchy in Italy. She had blonde hair and bright green eyes. She was one dishy bitch. (When I came back, I used those exact words and she laughed. In the present life she has quite a few self-image issues and didn’t see herself as at all attractive. Saying these words resonated with her, and she liked the idea of being desirable.)
In the duchy, she was a servant girl employed to keep the Duke’s castle clean. She toiled long hours, and typically wasn’t given any attention by the royalty in the castle. BUT, she was noticed by the Duke as she went about her chores, who totally appreciated her voluptuous body. One thing led to another and eventually the Duke decided to fly in the face of convention and contrary to custom, make a common servant his wife/duchess. At the time, this was quite scandalous. Many were shocked and some dismayed because of the choice. Shortly after they got married, the duke died inexplicably – no one understood why, because he was in the prime of his life. My client, now the Duchess, was therefore thrust into a position of great power with little education concerning how to deal with the responsibilities she inherited. There was also a lot of resentment from the courtesans who opposed the original marriage.
After a suitable mourning period, the Vizier who had been running the duchy decided that it was time that he needed to marry the duchess. He coveted the power and of course wealth he would obtain through such a marriage, and felt that it was his right. She rejected the Vizier because she found him sexually repugnant. In her words he was “older, fat and odious”. (My client laughed out loud when I told her this part of the story.) But on the other hand, the duchess needed the Vizier in order to run the government because she had no background in the affairs of state. Mad at being rebuffed, the Vizier started stealing from her and eventually got caught. The duchess tried to have him arrested but because of all the resentment in the court he was tipped off, and he escaped to a neighboring duchy.
Banished to a neighboring duchy, and enraged at the turn of events, the Vizier hired on old crone to curse the Duchess. He wanted to make sure that the duchess never found love again and would never have success with all the money she had inherited which he thought was rightfully his. The old crone charged him for a curse with bound demons—a curse that would last for generations and was incredibly difficult to undo. She charged him this huge amount of money. BUT, the crone having seen the Duchess at a distance, thought that she was quite beautiful, and her heart softened. She knew the Duchess’ rags to riches story and had pity on her. Instead of binding demons into the curse, she only cursed the duchess using the jealousy and hatred of the vizier. The curse consisted of 2 parts: Part one: the duchess was cursed to never be successful with love again. Part two: She was cursed so that money would always cause her pain. These two curses had been following my client for many lifetimes and had caused many lifetimes of suffering.
In the end, the duchess died an unhappy woman who, although she tried, was never happy no matter how much money she had. People hated her because of her bitter nature, and in the end, the Duchess never found another husband. She died alone and unloved.
I came back into this reality, and wrote feverishly because this story was way more complex than any I had ever had previously. And because of its complexity, I was obviously channeling some powerful spirits who were trying to help. My client sat there watching me intently. I told her that I now knew what to do and how to solve her problem.
Taking a deep breath, I returned to that time period. I undid the two curses based on the vizier’s energy and returned that energy to the universe. I thanked the crone for her compassion because she lied to the vizier about the kind of curse she created, and returned the energy stolen from the Duchess back to my client along with a healing to complete the unraveling. This could have been a soul retrieval as well, but somehow I felt that the curse issue was more important.
As I told this story to my client, she began to cry. She looked at me gratefully, telling me that she finally got what had happened in her life. She never thought that her lack of being loved was at all related to her money issues. She had not even considered asking me to help her to be loved, but that with this healing not only could she be more clear about money but she also could once again feel that she deserved to be loved. She mentioned that there was a guy online who had been courting her and that she hadn’t really taken him seriously before. I suggested that she should take the time to meet him – who knows, maybe kissing this possible frog would turn him into a prince, similar to the story I had just told. She laughed, then hugged me. I got misty myself. It was a wonderful voyage, and a story with a happy ending and one with the possibility of many happy beginnings.
Fast forward six months: I stayed in touch with this amazing woman and still email her from time to time. Evidently my work started an unraveling of many other such issues, and started a cascade of healing that ultimately has put her in a much happier and fulfilling place. I am heartened to know that I had some small part in her voyage, and hope she continues on her happier and more fulfilling path.